Tip one: Get definitive. You may not know what you want, but you know what you don't want. Start with that. You can exclude the things in your life you don't want, and by doing so better shape what you do want. This applies to all aspects of your life, your careers, the characteristics in a partner, the food you eat for lunch.
Tip two: Start a journal. A journal is a personal book where you get to be the real you. It is assumed no one else will read it, and so you do not have to affect anything, or pretend to care about things you don't care about. Your thoughts and feelings in your journal are usually as good an insight into yourself as any. Of course, they may be tainted by what other people think and feel, and have influenced you to think and feel, or they might just be the real you. Go back and reread your entries, and start keeping a daily log of your feelings. As an added benefit, it is therapeutic.
Tip three: Define your beliefs, and why you believe them. It is important to know what you believe, and discover why you believe that. If you believe all mankind is inherently good, then you may find yourself getting taken advantage of regularly. If you believe that no matter what you do, your path is set, you may find it hard to make good choices. The point is, if you can define your belief set, you will understand better how and why you interact with people the way you do. This can be a huge help for making your relationships healthier.
Tip four: Start paying attention to your thoughts when you are by yourself. These can give you real insight to who you are. How do you react when you hear good news? What about when you hear bad?
Tip five: Identify your natural talents. Learning what you have a natural ability to do can help you know yourself better. As you develop those natural talents, you gain an even greater understanding of yourself. If you want to have healthy relationships, it is important to be healthy yourself. This is an excellent way to start down that path, learning to appreciate your own abilities and foster them.
When you are in touch with yourself, you will find that your relationships are more meaningful and better.
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